Posted 12:34 PM by Floyd

Damien Penny links to a canada.com article about an obsequious job-hunter whose cover letter was called "the most disturbing ever."

"If my mother's funeral was the day of a key deposition, I would do the eulogy via teleconference after the deposition. If my wedding was the date of a key trial, the wedding would be postponed," writes Toll, a third-year student at Tulane University in New Orleans.

"If the wife to be did not like it, I would inform her that work comes before EVERYTHING ELSE and that if she does not like this, she is free to find a competing husband."

On the fourth page, Toll goes on to say he is not "above" anything and is willing to make his own copies.

"If a piece of evidence was accidentally dropped into the garbage, I would have no problem going to the local dump and spending days covered knee-deep in the worst foul-smelling sludge imaginable to search for the evidence."

Sounds like an Onion editorial.